| Dont know why.. |
[Thursday
June 9th, 2005
12:00am] |
i dont really know why im updating, just trying to kill time i guess. things are wired lately. i dont even know what to say. i feel one way about someone or something, and then the next day things change and its all fucked up. i dont know if any of this even makes since but i dont even care according to no one will be reading this anyway, so there isnt a point for this entry. i guess its just for me to vent to myself. i just wish things were like the used to be. but im completely over that, i know that nothing can ever be the same, but i just wish things can be good for me. i want to feel the way i used to. feel so invincible like nothing could ever hurt me or bother me because i had so many amazing people surrounding me and loving me that nothing else mattered. all i want is friends. people that care for me. dont get me wrong, there are a few people out there that really do care about me. but i want to feel that you are always there for me on my bad days. i want you know be able to tell when im upset and need you. i just need someone to talk to and just be with sometimes. i mean im not much of a talker, i love to listen. but sometimes keeping things in for so long, i need to let everything just go. its real hard for me to do that, but im working on it. i want to feel so good about myslef, i need selfesteem,its breaking apart and im trying to hold on to whats left of it, but its slipping away. i just want to feel good about myself, my friends, my family, my life in general. on the most part things are ok. but thats changing quick. also, if anyone dosent want me around, then please tell me. i dont mind. i just feel like im and inconvenience (sp?) sometimes. not particularly with anyone, but well i dont even know what i am saying anymore. i dont knwo what to say. even if i did know what to say, i wouldnt even know how to explain it. therefore i am done. this entry is all sloppy with thoughts, im about to go insane, cant stop thinking about everything and anything. i bet not one person read this entire enrty. but like i said, i dont care, this is a way of me venting to myself, even though all of the important detail thoughts are excluded. well it dosent matter. im bored and lonley and did nothing tonight. and was kicked out of my own bedroom, beacuse people are rude ot me and dont care what i think. by the way, im very sorry if this entry is rude on any part. i am in a horrible mood and feel like i am about to break down. just a bad night i must say. i need my incredible to come. aka something amazing and life changing must happen to me soon before i bust.
whatever, i need to leave tonight. jsut leave my house, go somewhere and anywhere. just to think and be alone. xcmvSMWFVSOInvinSVNIOSvnSOI!FUCK.
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[Sunday
December 26th, 2004
2:55pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 crazy |
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music |
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silverstein |
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Slept at Astrid last night. We had a "girls night" haha it was fun. Jessi and Tay slept over too. We woke up wicked late, this afternoon then went out for breakfast.
Tonight im going to Somer Ville to sleep over krissys house. I miss her so much. We are going to watch a movie and snuggle. Then tommorw night, off to Astrids again. Hmm i love my friends so much. All of them make me so happy. I honestly dont know what i would do wityh out them.
So tuesday i plan on going to see Amanda. Me and Holli and Kelli. i cant wait! i havent seen her in forever, its horrible.
well i have to go pack<3
love you all...
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[Thursday
December 9th, 2004
5:59pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 gloomy |
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music |
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tayler hall! |
] |
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[Sunday
December 5th, 2004
8:29pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 content |
] |
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music |
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boys night out<3 |
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i got this from the beautious Hol, thanks!
(comment anonomously please)
do this please?
1. One secret.
2. One compliment.
3. One non-compliment.
4. One love note.
5. Lyrics to a song.
6. How old you are.
7. How long we've been friends.
8. And a hint to who you are
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| Its snowing<3 |
[Friday
November 12th, 2004
1:15pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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content |
] |
| [ |
music |
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Cold Play |
] |
the most amazing night ever...
Astrid slept over and we stayed up so late jsut talking. I felt so good to jsut talk to her, i havent done it in a while. We talking about anything and everything. It was so nice. I love her so much, i dont know if she really knows how much she really measn to me<3<3
Anybody want to do something tonight? please call...
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[Monday
November 8th, 2004
10:54pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 ecstatic |
] |
| [ |
music |
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The Used - Choke Me |
] |
The Used tommorow night....EEP!!
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[Sunday
October 31st, 2004
9:59pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 creative |
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| [ |
music |
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My Chemical Romance |
] |
Mhhhhh. I had a pretty good weekend.
I slept over Krissys house friday...i have never laughed so much. i love being there. I love her and her sister and her mom! Oh man.
Dawns party friday, i didnt really stay too long but it was fun.
And i went trick-or-treating tonight. Twas VERY fun. I havent really had a halloween so fun. I went with Astrid, Fatty, Ian, Tay, and Chris. Then they went home and i met up with John z, Kalen and Loo. I have so mcuh candy, wow.
Im going to my baby Sams house friday! WOOT!
Im in the best mood....
night<3
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[Monday
October 25th, 2004
9:12pm] |
| [ |
mood |
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 bouncy |
] |
| [ |
music |
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My Chemical Romance - Im Not OK |
] |
Hopefully this will be an amzing weekend...
-Thursday- Witches woods.
-Friday- Krissys house for her birthday<3!
-Saturday- Dawns Party!!!!....(can anybody help me find her house, i have no clue!)
-Sunday- HALLOWEEN
THIS WEEKEND=FUN PLEASE!!
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[Wednesday
July 7th, 2004
2:45pm] |
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